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Sarah makes it better*

VALUE! Property Ladder, Channel 4, 8.00pm

Property LadderFirst of all: are the trails for the new series of Property Ladder not just the greatest things currently airing on British TV (and we include all of the programmes in that)? The idea of Sarah Beeny secretly breeding a load of highly skilled and merciless property developers who have the knowledge of how to make profit from property instilled into them from nursery age fills us with glee - and the fact that she seems to be pregnant again every time we turn around only adds fuel to this fire, frankly.

So! Here's a new nine-part series of the best property show on TV (as much as we love Phil and Kirstie, Sarah Beeny is in an entirely different league. Naomi Clever? Not quite. Amanda Lamb. Close, but no gazebo. Kevin McCloud? Not in this lifetime) and it makes sense to get in at the beginning, because the last handful of the nine episodes in this series will probably be those tarted up repeats with about five minutes' worth of new footage.

In this opening episode, Dame Sarah takes on two separate sets of developers who are hoping to bump up their kids' college funds by channeling it into property. And since the profit's needed for something important, clearly they're going to take the free advice of a seasoned property developer who's made a lot of money out of it and has her own TV show to prove it, right? Like fun they are, because that's the entire point of this show. We even heard a whisper that Dame Sarah gets owned by a teenager in this episode. Let's hope her famous diplomacy skills can see her through that one.

*Anyone commenting below correctly identifying the source of this song lyric gains our eternal admiration.

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'Stay' by Dubstar; track 5 of 12 on 3rd studio album 'Make It Better', released August 2000 (Japanese edition of album had 14 tracks); rated 3.5 stars in the dwindling, reduced-size Melody Maker (got a little box and a photograph in the corner of the page); perhaps the third or fourth best song on Dubstar's third best/least good studio album.

By Blogger Nick, at 9:56 am  

This comment has been removed by the author.

By Blogger Nick, at 9:56 am  

Very good, gold star. But you lose marks for that final comment, which is clearly wrong.

By Blogger Steve, at 7:44 am  

Well, it's certainly less good than 'Disgraceful' and 'Goodbye', what with at least 25% of the songs on it not actually having a tune, but I concede that the first half is pretty excellent, and the sleeve photographs (and Sarah's frocks/shoes/shark) are quite good.

[Barely] Sticking with the Property Ladder theme, which is the best Saint Etienne song and album? (Hint: The best song isn't on the best album).

Lots of love,

Nick
xxx

By Blogger Nick, at 9:15 am  

Can I jump in here?

Best Saint Etienne song - He's on the Phone. It wouldn't be right if ALL pop music sounded like that, but if it was at least THAT GOOD the world would be a better place.

Best Saint Etienne album - Good Humor. Also ranks as the best album ever. By anyone.

Sorry for jumping in unannounced but it isn't often I get to argue the toss about this sort of thing with other people. Thank you.

By Blogger chris, at 11:48 pm  

Ooh, a heated debate about music! I wasn't expecting this.

I'm not an expert on Saint Etienne albums since I only own the greatest hits and Tales from Turnpike House, but the best song for my money is 'Pale Movie'.

By Blogger Steve, at 7:43 am  

I THINK Turnpike House is probably the best studio album, although the (proper) Greatest Hits is pretty flawless as an overall thing. If it's not that, it's So Tough, but since 'Leafhound' is on So Tough and I said that the best song wasn't on the album, that would make something I said before wrong, so it isn't. ('Leafhound' is the best song, clearly, although 'Pale Movie' and 'He's On The Phone' come quite close.)

And that is what I think.

Thank you!

By Blogger Nick, at 11:04 am  

He's on the Phone is not only the greatest SE song, but the second greatest song ever.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 11:37 am  

It's Dubstar!

But several someones already said that. Boo.

Saint Etienne? Hmmm.. I love me them Japanese imports with the odd songs but either the first (Foxbase Alpha) or last (Turnpike House) albums are the best.

By Blogger DanProject76, at 5:17 pm  

This is one of those strange situations. I wouldn't have picked Leafhound or Pale Movie as the best Saint Et' song, but there is absolutely no way whatsoever that I'm gonna argue with anyone who thinks so. They're all brilliant. Does that make sense?

Smash the System has to be the best best of ever - no doubt about that. I can't even think of anything that comes close, despite there being some really good ones.

Here's one that's gone unmentioned - what about the middle-section of How We Used to Live?

By Blogger chris, at 12:24 am  

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