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You're fired. And you're fired. Oh, and you? You're fired.

SACKING! The Apprentice, BBC1, 9.00pm

The ApprenticeHere it goes again, folks: it doesn't seem very long ago that the country was firmly in the grips of Badgermania, does it? Unfortunately it demonstrated our lack of ability to pick the winning horse once again: we backed Karen to begin with, only for her to get fired in week two, at which point we switched allegiance to Michelle, on the suspicion that she was one of those stealth competent ones. But then when she narrowly escaped getting fired in the TopShop challenge and did a bit of a pisspoor project manager job, so we assumed that she stood absolutely no chance of winning and switched our allegiance to Team Badger with the rest of the country, only for Michelle to pip Ruth at the final post. But golly, wasn't it nailbiting?

Expect blood to be pouring from our cuticles at around 9.55pm for the next few months, then, because it's back, with a whole new selection of delusional cannon fodder aspiring businesspeople all vying for that lucrative contract with Sralan Sugar and praying that they're not on the receiving end of the Gruffly-Pointed Finger of Certain Doom. We've had a look at the website to see how this year's candidates shape up, and on first impressions we're backing financial advisor Jadine Johnson, which probably means she'll be lucky to survive week three. Although we're fascinated by "bankrupt entrepreneur" Rory Laing, who we suspect may turn out to be this year's Paul Tulip. To be perfectly honest, it doesn't look like there are any contestants that we'd quite like to bum, but that didn't stop us enjoying the last series.

Apparently the first task involves selling coffee on the streets of London. If last year's first task is anything to go by, the boys will try to smarmily charm their way through it while the girls will all wear low-cult tops and short skirts and sex their way through the task (not literally, we hasten to add). Frankly if they actually try to approach it any other way, we'll be hugely disappointed.

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According to a Sunday Newspaper, Sir Alan gets upset when two of the contestants make the beast with two backs during a task.

...so long as the Scottish one isn't as whiney and annoying as last year.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 10:28 am  

Low-cult tops? I didn't realise you'd started selling merchandise... ;)

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 7:42 pm  

you didnt' want to bum Syed last year?

By Blogger junky, at 12:12 am  

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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