Wednesday, March 16, 2005
TANYA'S BLONDE HIGHLIGHTS
All the TV that's mad, bad, or just a little bit evil for Wednesday. Our Tiny Tanya Turner ratings 
show just how low each show goes – the more Tanyas a show scores, the more mental it is.
» FOOD! Jamie's School Dinners, Channel 4, 9.00pm
You've got to hand it to Jamie Oliver - this hasn't been so much a TV series as it has been a massive national campaign to improve the quality of kids' school dinners. The final instalment follows Jamie as he tries to get his scheme adopted across an entire London borough - but will he popping home afterwards for a celebratory foccacia, or a sorrowful risotto? 
» VIEWED! Desperate Housewives, Channel 4, 10.00pm
For a show where so much relies upon the idea that your neighbours are constantly monitoring what you're doing, it really has taken a long time for anyone to notice that Mrs Huber was bludgeoned to death with Mary Alice's blender a few weeks back. Edie, whose heart is in the right place (even if most of her face isn't), takes it upon herself to organise a search this week just as Mrs Huber's sister turns up. We'll be squealing with delight, for she is played by Harriet Sansom-Harris, recognisable from many bit-parts over the years, but chiefly as Frasier's demonic agent Bebe.
» LEWD! Showgirls, Channel 4, 11.05pm
It's a hat-trick for Channel 4 tonight as they deal their trump card in the form of The Best Movie Ever Made*. Prepare for those lovely wholesome memories of Jessie Spano to get trampled into the ground as Elizabeth Berkeley heads to Las Vegas hoping to make it as a showgirl, stopping to mispronounce Versace and have a lot of sex along the way, including one display of alarming litheness in a swimming pool.
*Not officially proven.
» Is there something we've missed? Click on the comment link to share your tips.
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