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Oh, the frustration! The MP3 player we got for Christmas is playing up already. Our stupid computer won't recognise the device, and now all the effing songs are skipping. What an utter, utter shitshow. The only things keeping us calm are these amazing facts about Wednesday, January 19:
» To those who describe morning television as "bollocks", you would have been right had you tuned into This Morning today in 1999. The programme showed showed full male nudity during a story on testicular cancer and self-examination.
» Helen Duncan became the last person ever to be arrested for witchcraft, today in 1944. She was sentenced to nine months in prison as punishment for her witchery tendencies.
» The Peak District police force's new fake fur hats were unveiled six years ago today, just as scientists announced development of a central heating system that could automatically respond to weather forecasts.
» The Pop Idol finalists were whittled down from five to four when Brummie Hayley Evetts became the fifth person to be voted off, three years ago today. She had been described by judge Simon Cowell as "so sexy".
» Happy birthday to: Former and probably impending Eastenders actor Mike Reid, aka Frank Butcher (65), the ever-lovely Dolly Parton (59), and Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em actor Michael Crawford (63).
» Unrelated fact of the day: Honorificabilitudinitatibus is the longest English word that consists strictly of alternating consonants and vowels. But we've no idea what it means. Suggestions below, please . . .

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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