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TANYA'S BLONDE HIGHLIGHTS

All the TV that's mad, bad, or just a little bit evil for Tuesday. Our Tiny Tanya Turner ratings show just how low each show goes – the more Tanyas a show scores, the more mental it is.
» TWITCH! Hollyoaks, Channel 4, 6.30pm
Slutty Steph displays more of her fine judgement tonight when she sets her cap at Stuart, conveniently becoming a fitness obsessive in the process. If anyone out there knows what Stuart's appeal is meant to be, please could they let us know? We're sure he's got a nice body, but he's got a face like a car crash and an unbelievably annoying accent.
» BITCH! Welcome To The O.C. - A Day In The Life, E4, 9.00pm
It's not quite time for the new series yet, but E4 are bringing us this special feature to get us in the mood. While we're a little saddened that they decided not to include the word "bitch" in the show's title (notice that this site is not above that, at least), this should get you up to speed on the goings on with Ryan, Seth, Summer, and boring Marissa. HoYay! abounds.
» GLITCH! Shameless, Channel 4, 10.00pm
A competition for best-kept garden sets rivalries aflame on the estate tonight. Sounds like the cue for hijinks and hilarious mix-ups aplenty to us.
» Is there something we've missed? Click on the comment link to share your tips.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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