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All the TV that's mad, bad, or just a little bit evil for Tuesday. Our Tiny Tanya Turner ratings show just how low each show goes – the more Tanyas a show scores, the more mental it is.
» COAST! Euro Family Xchange, BBC Two, 6.00pm
Family Xchange is one of those shows that we love unreservedly, and yet never seems to have gained the widespread recognition deserves. Sort of a Wife Swap where everyone takes part, this series focuses on a family from England swapping with a family in Germany and experiencing the usual trials and tribulations about social and cultural differences. What we really want to know, however, is if anybody in this series manages to top the rat-child with a horrendous mullet from the first series as our favourite TV personality ever.
» GHOST! Dead Famous, LivingTV, 9.00pm
Gail Porter (or should be be using her married name? What does she prefer, Gail Porter, Gail Hipgrave, or Gail Out Of Toploader?) tries valiantly to fill the chronic gap in LivingTV's schedule caused by Most Haunted taking a break by attempting to contact the spirit of Alfred Hitchcock. We hope Gail manages to contact the other side: they might be able to tell her if there's anything better on.
» TOAST! 25 Years Of The Comedy Store - A Personal History By Paul Merton, BBC One, 10.35pm
Despite having quite possibly the longest, and certainly the ponciest, title of any show Tanya has ever highlighted blondely, this still ought to be good. A great number of the comedians who got their big breaks at the Comedy Store (think Rik Mayall, Josie Lawrence, Alexei Sayle and French & Saunders) chat to Paul Merton about the gool ol' days of comedy.
» Is there something we've missed? Click on the comment link to share your tips.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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