Thursday, May 06, 2004
AGGIE, DO-DO-DO (CLEAN OUR HOUSE, PLEASE)
Oh, how fine the feeling of self-improvement. We're so chuffed with the return of Kim and Aggie to our screens that we actually gave the draining board a clean before doing the dishes last night.
But even at its most shambolic, our residence has never resembled the crusty abode of last night's project, computer programmer Marc.
We particularly felt for Kim as she inspected the "dried twinky-twonks" in the guy's toilet, particularly as they lay so close to the "furry rug" nestling behind the seat.
Needless to say, it wasn't long before some intense washing, dusting and polishing soon had Marc's place back to his former glory (circa 1987).
As fierce as the team's scrubbing was, though, it wasn't a patch on what a beautician did to poor teaching assistant Ronnie in 10 Years Younger in 10 Days.
The chemical peel (administered by a woman who gleefully shared: "I often inject vitamins into my face") just made us itch. Not as much as it did poor Ronnie, though, who looked like she'd headbutted a candyfloss for the next few days.
Nevertheless, the peel, haircut, new wardrobe and make-up truly did leave the 42-year-old looking a sprightly 37, as estimated by the general public. Not bad when they first thought she was pushing 50.
Still, we can't help thinking that Kim may have had a quicker and less painful miracle cure for Ronnie. There's nothing that she can't make glow with a capful of bleach and some elbow grease: "Come on luvvie, let Kimmy have a look . . ."
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