Friday, February 23, 2007
Soap gaiety update
GAYS! Coronation Street, ITV1, 7.30pm
In accordance with the terms of our trading licence, we are obliged to bring you regular reports of matters of soap gaiety that we deem to be important. And while we may not be quite as excited by this as we were by the Craig/John Paul = OTP storyline in Hollyoaks (which has now become the yardstick against which all future acts of soap gaiety shall be measured), it is important that we keep abreast of developments in Corrie's first bisexual love triangle.
So! We all know by this stage that Michelle's suave new boyfriend Sonny is not all that he seems, because he's actually one of those dirty bisexualists, and once upon a time he was having it bumwise with Sean, of course (there being so few gays in Manchester, this was bound to happen). And proving that one should never trust a bisexual (not that we speak from embittered experience or anything), Sonny bumps into a bunch of Weatherfieldians - including Sean - on a night out, one thing leads to another and he and Sean have a bit of a snog. Of course, such an event can not go unobserved, and it just so happens that Sonny's love rival Steve happens to witness this little turn of events, which probably bodes quite well for him.
Perhaps we're being a little uncharitable but we can't quite bring ourselves to care quite as much about this bit of homo action on the grounds that it appears to have more relevance to the placing of obstacles in the way of fairytale couple Michelle and Steve than it does to giving Weatherfield's gays something to actually do. We could be wrong, of course, and if this does in future prove to be a Very Important Act of Soap Gaiety with Serious Future Repercussions, then we'll gladly retract the above statement at a later date. But let's be honest here: we're not half as interested in this storyline as we are in the one whereby sick, twisted and therefore utterly brilliant David Platt is trying to blackmail Tracy Barlow into sleeping with him. It's very incredibly wrong, and yet they're both so vile that it goes right around the loop and goes back to being a thoroughly great idea. So we're caring about that a little bit more right now.
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ALSO! Peter Barlow was being gay (well, talking softly within the context of a gay relationship) with Liam Connor in that awful thing about worthy Manchester lawyers with John Hannah in it on BBC1 the other night.
Liam Connor was (obviously) very puppyish and sweet as a slightly persecuted gay [web designer]. Peter Barlow didn't look as much like a gay as he did when Chris Gascoyne first came into Corrie after Peter had left the Navy and had his hair cropped. His shirt and tie weren't very nice together, either.
By 9:04 am, at
!!! the persecution of clean living trust-worthy bisexuals continues. nobody loves us.. but everyone wants us.