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Salt og peber

They’re the words every parent dreads hearing from their young son: “Mummy and Daddy, please can I have a cruet set for my fifth birthday?” Quite apart from what you've just discovered about his future choice of lifestyle (you've got a good ten years to perfect your shocked expressions for when he drops the now-inevitable bombshell about his personal preferences), in the meantime you're left with a more pressing issue: where the fuck do you buy a cruet set for a five year-old?

Well, as any sensible person will tell you, there’s never been a problem that couldn't be solved with LEGO, and this is no exception! ILVA might think they've got the monopoly on exported Danish housewares, but while they strive to be the Danish IKEA, LEGO seem to have repositioned themselves as a cross between the Danish Le Creuset and the Danish Paperchase with, quite literally, the greatest collection of household items in the world.

Breeze across to LEGO.com and search the online shop for an amazing range of domestic essentials with classic LEGO flava, including fridge magnets in the shape of LEGO bricks, coin banks in the shape of LEGO bricks, lunchboxes in the shape of LEGO bricks, rubbish erasers in the shape of LEGO bricks and coasters in the shape of LEGO base plates. Our favourite three are the corkscrew and bottle opener set (in the shape of LEGO bricks, natch), the conceptually-perfect ice brick tray (freeze your ice cubes in the shape of LEGO bricks - seriously, how has nobody ever thought of this before?!) and, of course, the fantastic LEGO salt and pepper shaker set in the shape of some quite masculine-looking LEGO minifigure heads. Check out those manly secondary sexual characteristics! The kitchen isn't just a place for mummies, after all.

The best thing is, as it's suitable for age five plus, it's one birthday gift that your child – or, indeed, you – will never grow out of. And for added party fun, simply place one of the shakers inside one of the lunchboxes and - bingo! - you've got LEGO Se7en. Fun for the whole family! As long as they're over five.

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I like how salt in an 80s gay with a handlebar moustache and the pepper is an 80s lesbian with stubble. Finally you can learn about alternative sexuality while lightly seasoning your food.

By Blogger [james], at 10:36 am  

I love it and I want it all!

PS. I'm also loving the current selection of Google Ads. Always wondered where I should apply for Jewish/Wildlife/Prayer volunteer work. How they match these ads to us viewers so precisely remains a mystery...

By Anonymous TJ, at 2:33 pm  

Sssh! I bought these a couple of weeks ago as a present!

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 6:13 pm  

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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