(function() { (function(){function c(a){this.t={};this.tick=function(a,c,b){var d=void 0!=b?b:(new Date).getTime();this.t[a]=[d,c];if(void 0==b)try{window.console.timeStamp("CSI/"+a)}catch(l){}};this.tick("start",null,a)}var a;if(window.performance)var e=(a=window.performance.timing)&&a.responseStart;var h=0=b&&(window.jstiming.srt=e-b)}if(a){var d=window.jstiming.load;0=b&&(d.tick("_wtsrt",void 0,b),d.tick("wtsrt_","_wtsrt", e),d.tick("tbsd_","wtsrt_"))}try{a=null,window.chrome&&window.chrome.csi&&(a=Math.floor(window.chrome.csi().pageT),d&&0=c&&window.jstiming.load.tick("aft")};var f=!1;function g(){f||(f=!0,window.jstiming.load.tick("firstScrollTime"))}window.addEventListener?window.addEventListener("scroll",g,!1):window.attachEvent("onscroll",g); })(); lowculture: Someone alert the crash team!

Someone alert the crash team!

DRAMA! Battle for the Holby City, BBC4, 9.30pm

Judging by that über-dramatic title, this is time for another dramatic incident at Holby City hospital. Whatever could it be? Another armed siege, perhaps? An armoured vehicle crashing into the A&E department? Yet another unfortunate nurse being stabbed in the basement and not discovered until it's almost too late? No doubt the pen-pushers in middle management will try to avert the crisis and yet somehow succeed in making it worse for everyone by hiring a cut-price CCTV system or failing to staff security efficiently. Connie Beauchamp will be walking around in a nice woolly skirt-suit demanding the head of whoever is responsible.

It certainly sounds exciting, whatever is going to happen!

...hold on. This doesn't sound very BBC4. Maybe we misread the Radio Times. We're just going to go back and check. Please bear with us.

*LOWCULTURE testcard featuring Tanya Turner attempting to finish a game of noughts and crosses with a stolen dead baby looking onwards*

Oh. Apparently it's Battle for the Holy City, and it's actually something quite serious about Israel's seizure of Jerusalem during the Six Day War in 1967, and nothing to do with hospital drama at all. Still, we wonder what Nurse Chrissie Williams would make of it all.

By Steve :: Post link :: ::  
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You Guys!! You actually had me there for a minute... I was salivating at the prospect of an extra portion of Connie this week (actually my only portion of Connie this week given that she appeared to be conspicuous in her absence on Tuesday...) - Bastards!
Still love you though... and infact that may well be my favourite lowculture post ever, you guys just get funnier and funnier!

By Anonymous Donna, at 11:24 am  

Am loving the Lowculture testcard. That real clown almost looks as though it is smeared in fake tan anyway.

By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:27 pm  

What a HILARIOUS mix-up.

By Blogger Adrian, at 3:51 pm  

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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