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Kitten to Aristocat

PYGMALION! My Fair Kerry, ITV1, 9.00pm
It’s no surprise that, with the advent of digital television and its new technological opportunities, broadcasters are looking for new and inventive ways of providing interactivity in their programmes. That said, we’re not entirely sure that turning the schedule into an extended version of Spot the Difference quite fulfils that objective. My Fair Kerry is basically Celebrity Ladette To Lady, the civilian version of which finished last week, coincidentally in this very timeslot. Having realised that telling the tabloids she doesn’t blame Delta Goodrem for breaking up her marriage leaves her with very little else to sell, Kerry gets back into the famewhore saddle and canters off to some elocution and etiquette lessons. It might be interesting, certainly, but we can’t help thinking there are other personalities we’d have preferred to see doing this rather than the somewhat overexposed Ms Katona. Charlotte Church? Mutya from Sugababes? Melanie C? Even Sara Cox, to be perfectly honest. The “ultimate test” (for there must always be one of those) will be at the Vienna Opera Ball, now famous for being the place where Geri Halliwell got lost on the way to the toilet and missed the part of the event she’d been booked to attend. Capturing that moment would have made this show much, much better.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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