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Kill Gil (or Nick, possibly)

GORE! CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, Five, 9.00pm
Who do you think you are? Tarantino’s new star? Is that who you are? Well, if you’re a member of the cast of CSI, then yes, you probably do, because that’s who’s at the helm of this double-parter of a season finale. CSI is one of those programmes that’s a bit like Charmed in that it doesn’t matter when we turn on the TV, there always seems to be at least one channel showing it somewhere, but it’s not generally our first choice for viewing. That said, it does have a lot over Charmed in that it’s generally well-written, well-acted, cunningly plotted, witty, and has never once left us with that guilty post-viewing feeling, so perhaps they’re not that similar after all. Anyway, that aside, the teaming of Tarantino and CSI seems like a match made in heaven, since not only is neither party particularly averse to a bit of gore, but apparently Tarantino is a massive fan of the show and didn’t really take much persuading to do his own episode. Tonight, then, Gil Grissom and the team get a shock when they find out that Nick has been kidnapped and buried alive. Not only that, but he’s being filmed over a webcam. Honestly, we don’t know of a single place on the internet that’s a safe bastion from filth like that. Not even this one, evidently.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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