Tuesday, May 10, 2005
TANYA'S BLONDE HIGHLIGHTS
All the TV that's mad, bad, or just a little bit evil for Tuesday. Our Tiny Tanya Turner ratings show just how low each show goes – the more Tanyas a show scores, the more mental it is.
» MOOD! Life Isn't All Ha Ha Hee Hee, BBC1, 9.00pm
Our memories of the wonder that is Meera Syal extend right back to 1998, when we were attending the A Level English conference in London and she was the only person to actually give an interesting and entertaining presentation (well, Germaine Greer did as well, but we already sang her praises during Celebrity Big Brother). With that in mind, we'll watch just about anything she's had even a passing involvement in - so considering this is co-written by her, based on a novel she wrote, and starring her, we're pretty happy right now. Those of you wishing for further persuasion (although frankly we don't see what else needs to be said) would do well to note that Footballers' Wives' Laila Rouass plays another of the lead roles. It's a standard tale of childhood friends adjusting to the unhappiness of their adult lives - but it ought to be a cut above the usual.
» SCREWED! Bad Girls, ITV1, 9.00pm
Bad Girls and Footballers' Wives in the same week? Oh, ITV1, truly you are spoiling us. Fenner is still adjusting to a slightly different viewpoint of prison, having been banged up at the end of last series for running someone over and framing Karen Betts for it. Being Fenner, of course, he's not taking it lying down (or indeed any other way, despite what you think you know about prison life) and is plotting his escape, and no doubt his vengeance. Meanwhile, Guv'nor Gaylord has taken charge of D Wing and is making his presence felt, while two new inmates arrive in the form of Crossroads' Rebecca Hazlewood and Nicola Stapleton, who has now achieved the enviable hat trick of starring in EastEnders, Bad Girls and Simon And The Witch. Now there's a CV.
» BROOD! Bring Back...Grange Hill, Channel 4, 10.00pm
On the one hand, the thought of the former stars of Grange Hill getting back together for one final reprise of the anti-drug anthem 'Just Say No' makes us giddy with excitement. On the other hand, Justin Lee Collins (who is, at best, an acquired taste) running around and haranguing said former child actors into taking part, quite possibly whether they like it or not, makes us feel a little bit dirty, and not in the good way. We love the idea of this show (hence its inclusion in today's Blonde Highlights), but we really hope the execution is better than we're anticipating.
» LEWD! Comedy Lab: Modern Toss, Channel 4, 11.40pm
Four highlights today? Yep, because we couldn't bear to leave any of these out. Cult comic Modern Toss, home of Daytrippers, Home Clubber, Insect Jackass, and our personal favourite Mr Tourette: Master Signwriter make their TV debut. There will be animation, there will be live sequences (some directed by lowculture hero Joe Cornish), the whole thing will be a bit odd, but as long as there are some inappropriately profane signs on display, we'll be happy as a pig in shit.
» Is there something we've missed? Click on the comment link to share your tips.