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FUCK ME FACTS. WITHOUT THE FACTS. FUCK!

We admit it – last week was a quiet week, even by our standards. Neil can't find a copy of the book he gets the Fuck Me Facts out of, and Paul's been pretty much too drunk to type for weeks now, leaving only Steve to entertain you with Tanya's Blonde Highlights. So, in lieu of your regular Fuck Me Facts, we're going to tell you what was happening in the world of us on this day in 2003. What a debacle!
» Tom Jones had appeared at the Brit Awards, and we deemed his beard "terrifying". And we were right.
» The Bo Selecta version of Michael Jackson starred in a hilarious re-interpretation of the infamous Martin Bashir interview.
» We tried out those Wrigley's Thin Ice minty things, and announced that the experience was "like going to church and taking communion, except you get a mint, and you will probably still go to hell".
» Dollar were due to appear on Reborn In The USA, so we wheeled out a remarkably flimsy gag about the female singer running a bric-a-brac emporium in Southend called Thereze's Bazaar.
» Crossroads was still on the telly! On that particular day, everyone thought Jimmy had committed suicide. Imagine the hilarity when it turned out he had done no such thing!

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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