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TV BUMMING ALERT!

Unemployed? Or just lazy? Then it's time to catch up with the terrifying decay of the terrifically untalented Dani Behr. Her US gay-themed dating show, Boy Meets Boy, is now airing on Five. It started yesterday, and it's back on today at 2.35pm, (clashing with Murder, She Wrote – what a choice, eh, The Gays?).
We hope that old bitch Jessica doesn't mind that her loyal followers flicking channels – after all, every episode of Murder, She Wrote has been on at least 500 times. Yesterday's was a particularly memorable one featuring a giant observatory telescope operated by the man who was in the Herbie movies, but that's neither here nor there.
Boy Meets Boy is one of these three things:
» A rare chance to see the intelligent and cutting humour of the gay diaspora bite through the shallow haze of reality programming on UK Daytime TV
» A shining diamonte of a programme that will lead to widespread acceptance and tolerance of bummers accross the globe
» A cheap, horrendously-made and deeply hilarious attempt at a dating show that exposes every worst stereotype of The Gays. And addictively awful at that.
We wouldn't like to prejudice your opinions, but suffice to say, IT'S THE THIRD.
Yesterday's show – the first of six –introduced us to James, the leading man, who is a 32-year-old benefits administrator in the human resources department of a law firm. What a catch! Competing for his love, and the chance to go on holiday with him to New Zealand, are 15 assorted men. But they don't just have to fool James into thinking they're not psychotic sociopaths – they must also face the scrutiny of his fag hag, Andra.
But here's the twist – not all of the 15 men assembled there are gay!
According to Bravo, who produced the show, this is "an interesting twist allowing for numerous avenues of heated on-air discussions and debates that challenge socially preconceived notions of what is considered gay and straight behavior."
And, we'll be blowed, it may be masquerading as a vehicle for some kind of anthropological/sociological experiment, but it soon descends into "bummer-spotting". This is a thoroughly enjoyable activity at 2.35pm on an other a Thruday afternoon, as is the really rather cringeworthy pre-amble that leading man James makes before giving his reasons for liking or disliking the men. Yesterday's classic was "I was sitting next to Franklin, and because of the proximity, i could really feel the closeness... if you know what I mean?". Oh, we do, James. Poetry, pure poetry.
If you want the heads-up on which ones really take it up the wrong 'un and which are just dirty cock teases, check out US Bravo's website – but while reading the bios, please note their disclaimer that "*participant responses may have been edited".
Well, they wouldn't want people thinking they are gay or anything...
(Thanks to James Foley!)

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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