Thursday, September 02, 2004
FUCK ME FACTS!
Imagine being trapped in a lift with Dido, who's trying to sooth the atmosphere by singing her entire back catalogue. And there's an angry wasp in there as well. And you really need a pee. That feeling of despair, fear and discomfort very closely describes the effect this week is having on us. But we won't bore you with the details. In fact - look! Here's some amazing facts about Thursday, September 2, to take your mind off all that troubles you:
» Prostitutes in Mexico City promised not to wear see-through clothing before 10pm in 1997. But come those chimes, its tits and minge as far as the eye can see.
» Two years later, police were hunting a gang of bungling robbers who ended up in an estate agents while trying to tunnel into a cash machine.
» It was revealed seven years ago that George Clooney was to become jSouth Park's first celebrity voiceover, playing a dog which discovers it's gay.
» Picture the scene - it's 1992 and you're in Maimi, where Hurricane Andrew is blowing it's arse off outside. Where to go for soup and a blanket when your hotel's blown away? Why, nowhere other than the office of Gloria Estefan, who set up an aid distribution centre during that very crisis.
» Happy birthday to: Keanu Reeves (40), Salma Hayek (38), and the only member of the Osbourne clan to know just how much exposure the family needs (i.e. none), Aimee (21).
» Unrelated fact of the day: Ancient Chinese artists would never paint pictures of women's feet. It's usually the ears we have trouble with, so we just sketch everyone wearing hats.