Tuesday, August 31, 2004
FUCK ME FACTS!
We will be attending one of the dullest local authority meetings imaginable this morning. No doubt we'll be sitting there while you peruse these amazing facts about Tuesday, August 31:
» Mrs Adolph Landeburg wore the firest ever split skirt in 1902. She was a horserider. And we bet that isn't all she was called, the hussy.
» A homeowner in Hereford flooded his front room when his bath overflowed in 2000. But before he could yell "Oh, for fuck's sake, look at the fucking state of my fucking living room!*" he discovered the water had revealed oil painted panels, dating from the 18th century, and worth around £500,000. So next time you're in the bath, remember to wash behind the ears, under arms and below the floorboards, just in case.
» Waste not, want not: On the same day, a Romanian football team was happy to secure new grounds. Until rainfall washed away the topsoil to reveal the human remains from the cemetery below. Ick!
» In a somewhat pantomime approach to policing, police chiefs in India offered their staff more money to grow huge moustaches in the fight against crime and terrorism, because it apparently made them look more menacing.
» Hooray! It's 47 years since Scottish Television went on-air. With a skirl of the bagpipes, a glass of whisky, and a scowl from Mrs Mack, no doubt.
» Happy birthday to: Ex-Eastender Todd Carty (42), energetic American actor Chris Tucker (32), and 80s popstrel Debbie Gibson (34).
*or something similar.