Friday, March 24, 2006
Drop everything! It's a soap wedding!
SADIE! Emmerdale, ITV1, 7.00pm
Regular readers of the site (hi, both of you!) may have remembered us getting very excited about previous soap weddings. This is because, as detailed extensively in our Soap Rules thread over on the messageboard, it is physically impossible to have a soap wedding that isn't dramatic. It just doesn't happen. Someone will always give birth, or die, or turn up out of the blue to announce that one of the parties is already married, or (better than all of these) there will be a vicious catfight in the aisle.
In tonight's episode of Emmerdale, Sadie King is due to get married to the well-meaning but clearly doomed Alasdair, and there is not even the remotest chance that it will run smoothly. Sadie's attracted ex-lovers and enemies in equal amounts since arriving in the Dales, and since she's shagged or snogged her way through a large percentage of the King family (don't panic, incest-naysayers, King is her married name, not her maiden name), there's a fairly strong possibility that at least one of them will try to stop the proceedings.
What will make this glorious occasion all the more bittersweet is that Patsy Kensit is leaving the show soon to join Holby City, so we will have to soak up every glorious second of bitchy screentime she has left. Sadly all of LOWCULTURE's favourite soap bitches are taking a dive this year, since we still haven't quite got over the loss of the marvellous Tracy Ann Oberman from EastEnders, although we take comfort from the fact that she's gone on to bigger and better things and will soon be deploying The Hair for the purpose of scaring us shitless in Doctor Who. But we digress. It's Sadie's wedding day, and while it may not be a happy occasion for her, it ought to be a good one for the rest of us.
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And hello to you too! x
By 
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9:15 am
