If you like to hang around gay bars in London, you're never quite sure who you are going to meet. Well, apart from Brian Dowling, that is. Anticipation was, therefore, at fever pitch as Team Lowculture headed for Popstarz on Friday, giddy with excitement about the potential for celebrity stalking.
Non-gay social engagements earlier in the week had already thrown up a Bad Boy Inc, Mikey Graham from out of Boyzone, and no fewer than two members of Worlds Apart, so there was great confidence that a Le Tigre PA would attract homosexualist celebrities of broadly similar quality – if not worse!
Alas, the only people Le Tigre attracted were big shouty militant lesbians who seemed intent on burning our eyes out of their fucking sockets with their aggressive cigarette dancing. There were no celebs to be seen, anywhere, so the timetable for Operation Bag A Children's TV Presenter Boyfriend slips back still further.
The nearest thing to a celebrity was a rather friendly lady called Alexis, who claimed to work on Nip/Tuck ("My name is in the credits, but not until the second season)".
She used her charms to great effect as she sweet-talked her way to the head of the queue for the cloakroom ("You're waaaay cuter than HIM! Are you gay?").
Sadly, she wasn't Alexis out of Dynasty, though. That really would have been a story worth posting on a website. Unlike this one.
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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses.
We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.