All the TV that's mad, bad, or just a little bit evil for THURSDAY. Our Tiny Tanya Turner ratings show just how low each show goes – the more Tanyas a show scores, the more mental it is.
» RUSTLING Emmerdale, ITV1, 7pm We caught an episode of Emmerdale (sounds nasty, doesn't it?) for the first time in ages last night, and it was rather good. The Dingles have accidentally stolen a cow from Andy, and there was some hilarious comedy "business" with a stun gun. The best line, though, was when the police went into the Woolpack to ask about the missing beast and Val called through the back to Louise, who promptly appeared. "I don't know what you mean, officers," said Val, "she's not missing at all." Great stuff!
» JAZZ HANDS! When Will I Be Famous, BBC1, 7pm New docusoap showing a year in the life of some stage school brats at the Sylvia Young Theatre School.
» TONIGHT, BRIAN, I'M GOING TO BE...! Phoenix Nights, Channel 4, 10.50pm Last in this welcome series of repeats. It's Stars In Their Eyes night at the Phoenix, and Den Perry is determined to put a stop to the whole affair.
» Are we missing something great? Or even something rubbish – we're honestly not fussed! Click on the comment link below and tell us all about it.
* To open in a new window, click anywhere EXCEPT the icon.
Your views from our forums. Click on the quote to join the discussion.
According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses.
We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.