Another week, another resurrection of the Fuck Me Facts! Here are some amazing things about Monday, July 5:
» It's four years since Russian Roman Kunikov unveiled his gas-powered shoes, which could propel the wearer 13feet in a singles step, at 25miles per hour. Whilst wearing the Shit Me Slacks, we suppose.
» A nightclub in Somerset held an early Christmas Party for local firewcrews, hospitals and the ambulance service, because they would be working over the Christmas period three years ago. Nauseating enough to make you want to burn something and punch someone in the face.
» On the same day, a city worker was sacked after pictures of him having sex at Ascot appeared in the national newspapers. But was it with femme or filly?
» Oh, dahlins! Three years ago, two intruders broke into the Big Brother house and twatted about in the hot tub, confronting the housemates.
» It's half a century since Elvis made his frist commercial recording, That's All Right Mama, but only six years since Five's debut album hit number one in the charts.
» Happy birthday to: Shane Filan from Westlife (25), and Huey Lewis (54). It's also the birthdate of Etienne De Silhouette, the French minister of finance who gave his name to outline portraits. But he's dead now.
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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses.
We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.