Tuesday, June 08, 2004
WHY D'YOU WANNA GO THOUGH TIME AND SPACE? BECAUSE WE WANT TO, BECAUSE WE WANT TO!
Unbelievable as it may seem, the day we have been patiently awaiting for the last 28 years may soon be upon us.
Yes, it's looking terrifyingly likely that Doctor Who is about to become cool.
Not the shonky old version where everything was made out of egg boxes and bubble wrap, of course (although we still think that was a little bit cool). We mean the new one, the one they're about to start filming in Wales with Christopher Eccleston and (shriek!) Billie Piper.
If you've not reached the stage where you're scouring the Doctor Who websites for news on the new series (and trust us, you will), you will be excited to learn that:
» The first episode currently goes by the title Rose, which is the name of Billie's character. This means Rose must be Very Important Indeed, as the old series ran for 26 years and they never felt the need to name an episode Adric or Melanie Fucking Bush, did they?
» All kinds of people (including Slipknot) are pretending they have been asked to record a new version of the theme music, but they're all just talking rubbish. Perhaps Billie could sing it!
» Episode 2 is called The End Of The World, but it's only episode two, so that's probably not very likely at all, is it? On the other hand, perhaps it is. We just don't know, so we are making things up!
» We're more confident in predicting that episode 4 will feature the aliens of London – as it has the working title Aliens Of London (Part 1).
» The newspapers reckon this one concerns an evil plastic double of David Beckham running amok. How great would that be? Even if it is probably not true.
» Some of it is being written by the same person who wrote Press Gang. This is nothing short of amazing, especially when you consider that much of the rest of it is being written by the person who wrote spook soap Springhill (not to mention a lesser-known series called Queer As something-or-other).
» You'll never guess what episode 5 is called! Unless you guess that it is going to be called Aliens Of London (Part 2). In which case you would. And you would be right.
» Unless they decide to change it, of course.
» Top comics artist Bryan Hitch is going to be deciding how some of it looks. According to people who know about that sort of thing, this is very exciting. He might be doing some drawings right now, in fact. Imagine that!
» We repeat: BILLIE PIPER! Shriek! Again! She's on the cover of Doctor Who Magazine this month, too. Did you think that would happen in your lifetime? No.