The schlock you won't want to miss this weekend
SATURDAY » Big Brother 9pm, Channel 4 ... It's the last live challenge – a search for needles in a haystack.
» Star Trek: After They Were Famous 9.15pm, ITV ... The original crew of the Starship Enterprise reflect on hairpieces, corsets and impending death.
» Hackers 9.35pm, Channel 4 ... Chuckle at what passed for high-tech in 1995.
» The Terror Inside 11.55pm, Five ... Heather Locklear stars as a woman suffering from multiple personality disorder who must confront the secrets of her past to save herself.
SUNDAY » VIP 6.05pm, Bravo ... Pamela Anderson and her crime-busting tits make a welcome return to our screens.
» Coronation Street 7.30pm, ITV1 ... Peter cheerfully prepares to commit bigamy, while Shelly must decide whether she will turn up at the church. Will she make it up the aisle? Will Peter's other wife put in an appearance? And will Tracy Barlow really drug-rape Roy Cropper?
» Real Vampires Exposed 8.35pm, ITV2 ... No further explanation required, really.
» The Truth About Gay Animals 2.50am, Channel 4 ... Scott Capurro investigates bumming in the animal kingdom.
» Is there something else we should be watching? Click on the comment link.
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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses.
We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.