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More meaningless industry back-patting

AWARDS! The Brit Awards 2008, ITV1, 8.00pm

The BritsWe're not suggesting for a minute that you should ignore the arrival of the marvellous Martha Jones in tonight's episode of Torchwood, and with it, the best episode of the series so far, but the annual airing of the British music industry's favourite excuse to give itself a big ol' hug at least deserves a mention of some kind, however muted.

As usual, the shortlist was greeted with the usual amount of scoffing and raised eyebrows (including one memorable lambasting from the Daily Telegraph's rock critic, which, as jobs go, would appear to have all the cachet of being Realism Advisor on Hollyoaks), the scandal this year being the unexpected selection of pop-themed nominations. Which basically means Leona Lewis and Mika are up for everything, and Girls Aloud got a surprise nod. Just think if they won: the plummeting shares in the guitar industry! Well, we can dream...

The event will be hosted by Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne, and recent tabloid reports have suggested the latter is threatening to strip naked, because he's wild and unconventional like that, and also it's possibly still 2002. But there's bound to be the odd talking point or two, given the event's history. Unless of course the invasion of pop kills the rock 'n' roll atmosphere and the most exciting headline turns out to be "Leona Lewis spills apple juice on expensive handbag", which is clearly what all the "serious music" fans are afraid of. Rock on everybody!

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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