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The long con(nor)

EXIT! Coronation Street, ITV1, 7.30 & 8.30pm

Coronation StreetWell, let this be a lesson to all of us, frankly. Being a prostitute may look like a fun and glamorous job that supplies you with endless amounts of cash for an apparently minimal amount of work, but it has its inevitable downsides. Sooner or later, people will see through your cunning ruse of posing as a property developer (although this has got us seeing Sarah Beeny in a new light - kidding! We love you Sarah! Please don't hate us!) when you end up boinking someone who later recognises you in the pub, and thereby outs you to your nearest and dearest. Still, Leanne's had quite the lucky escape - if she watched EastEnders a couple of years back and saw what happened to Janine, she would've seen how much worse she could've had it. Sleeping with Ian Beale. *shudder*

Of course, Leanne's secret hasn't been revealed to everyone just yet, but she's on shaky ground now that Lynda Block Carla has rumbled her, and got rightly miffed at Paul's involvement in the whole thing. Said ground gets notably wobblier when Paul decides to blame Leanne for the apparent dissolution of his marriage, the whole you-were-the-one-who-solicited-callgirls-in-the-first-place-you-pranny aspect of it apparently passing him by.

So he does what any sensible man in his position would do - and we don't really consider this a spoiler since it's been splashed over the pages of most TV periodicals by now - he bundles her into the boot of his car and drives off. Gives a whole new meaning to cash and carry, eh? Eh? Whew, tough crowd. Anyway, since soaps would be quite dull if people frequently bundled other people into the backs of their cars against that person's will only to release them around the corner entirely unharmed, so Paul's car is involved in a nasty crash. But who will survive? Again, it's no massive secret, but we're not going to spell it out. We're meant to be encouraging you to watch the telly, not to switch it off and do something less boring instead. You're confusing us with the Why Don't You? gang.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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