Wednesday, March 29, 2006
And you thought the cast of Lost had it bad...
CANNIBAL! Alive: Back To The Andes, Five, 8.00pm
We're all familiar with the basic plot of the movie Alive, yes? Based on a true story, South American rugby team survive a plane crash in the Andes, end up having to eat their own dead in order to stay alive, yada yada. Anyway, somebody has had the utterly superb idea of recreating it with celebrities. An idea, we're sure you'll agree, that had the potential to be the best television programme in the history of ever.
Sadly, we suspect it's going to be something of a disappointment in this show when nobody actually eats a human carcass - although we're sure it can't be long until that's one of the tasks in I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here. Even the celebrity cast itself is slightly disappointing - Jean-Christophe Novelli, Adam Rickitt (who we suspect only signed up because he misunderstood the point where they explained to him about eating people), Lord Freddie Windsor and Carole Caplin. We would, however, be willing to pay someone to chop up Carole Caplin and devour her, just because. Two of the real life crash survivors will also be taking part, and we're sure they're utterly overjoyed to see their experiences being belittled by a few D-list celebrities pretending to know how it felt.
Also on tonight: If you haven't seen any of this series of Desperate Housewives (Channel 4, 10.00pm), this is the one you need to see. The theme of the evening is kissing - a ball set in rolling by Gabrielle playfully kissing the adorable Tom at a party. Lynette, quelle surprise, is not happy - not least because she has spent her entire married life trying to ensure that Tom never has anything to be even remotely happy about. Bree is horrified to see son Andrew kissing his boyfriend Justin goodbye on the front porch in full view of the neighbours (that would be the mass-murdering, son-imprisoning, arson-committing, secret prostitute neighbours, then) - gasp! Won't somebody think of the children? The kissing scene itself is pretty chaste, but it does lay the groundwork for an excellent scene later where Bree catches Andrew and Justin in bed together, and we all get to ogle Ryan Carnes's buff bod. Hurrah!
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3 Comments:
I never knew it was a rugby team in Alive. A Latino rugby team at that. It suddenly takes on whole new ho-yay moments.
Hmm. I'm not sure that cannibalism is quite the best form of HoYay, though.
By 
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8:09 am
