Monday, January 16, 2006
Model citizens
POSE! America's Next Top Model, Living TV, 9.00pm
Before you say anything, we are well aware that we previewed this show last week. Before you go searching for that contract we signed to see if repeats entitle you to a refund, we'd like to point out that last week we previewed the special edition of this programme catching up with previous winners, whereas this week we're previewing the premiere of cycle five. Cycle five! Can you believe it? Already this show has produced worldwide celebrities like Adrianne Curry, Yoanna House, Eva Pigford and Naima Mora, who have gone on to dazzle us all with their mad modelling skillz. Well, okay, no one really knows what Adrianne and Yoanna are doing any more, and Eva and Naima seem to have made more of an impact in guest starring role on various UPN shows (the network that shows AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL in the States) than they have on the catwalk, but let's be honest here: we do not watch this show to see star models being crowned. We watch it for the bitchfights, and to measure how tall Tyra's weave/forehead/ego is each week.
There are some changes afoot this season: removed from the judging panel are Nolé Marin (hooray!) and Janice Dickinson (boo!). TOP MODEL without Janice does seem a bit like a fashion show without copious lines of coke, but we're reliably informed that she may pop up later in the series in a guest role, so all is not lost. Taking their places on the judging panel are, we believe, Twiggy (the world's first supermodel that wasn't Janice Dickinson) and the fabulous Ms. J Alexander (who needs no introduction, girlfriend).
Last year on the show we had outbreaks of impetigo (or "infantigo", as some of the girls called it), stress weight (otherwise known as "Keenyah is a greedy sow"), some disastrous makeovers, the so-called worst photo in ANTM history (and we still maintain that it was not Lluvy's fault), some top-notch bitchin' ("If we didn't get kicked off for hitting somebody, your ass would be tore up right now, because I ain't said shit to you") and of course Tyra "Bingo Wings" Banks flipping her weave at poor Tiffany, the Girl Who Didn't Cry Enough. We're sure that the finalists for this series will be all-new kinds of ass crazy, and guess what? We can't wait.
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3 Comments:
I loved in Season 4 when Michelle said she had a skin disease and Lluvy started scratching right then as if she thought she had it.
By 
, at
10:19 am
Who care's that Janice isnt in it now she gets her own TV show to find her own model - who needs ANTM when that airs?!
PLEASE say Nigel Barker has stayed.
I tught Yoanna was doing quite well for herself presenting on E! or something simillar.
-ddt-
By , at
3:34 pm
Can't wait.
Hopefully Tyra will 'lose it' again
By , at
4:36 pm
