Tuesday, September 27, 2005
Don't go into the theatre!
Now then, who's been keeping an eye on what Joe Pasquale has been up to? Bloody no-one, by the looks of things – we really need to think about working out some sort of a rota.
The sqeaky-voiced I'm A Celebrity winner is usually pretty harmless, but his latest project has the potential to send the whole of planet Earth spinning off its axis, plunging us all to a fiery doom in the heart of the sun.
What could possibly cause such a calamity for mankind?
Rentaghost – The Musical.
Yes, that's right. Joe has activated the astral lift, and the 1970s TV spooks will be descending from the spirit world onto the stage of a provincial theatre near you (providing you live in Baisingstoke or Grimsby).
No word yet on what part Joe will be playing, raising the dreadful possibility that we will see him in a jester's outfit as Timothy Claypole. Actually, we would rather see him play against type as screeching harridan Ethel Meaker, but that might be too much to hope for. Perhaps he will play Dobbin, the pantomime horse (we don't much mind which end).
Still, we would not wish to be too unkind to Joe. He has clearly been doing his research into all things spooky, as he reports on the show's official website:
"I saw a little ghost the other day flying down the street, I chased after him to get some advice from him on the show, Next thing he flew into a shop door way, I grabbed hold of him and realised he was a plastic bag blowing in the wind."
The show boasts an all-new musical score, including a show-stopping number called Me And My Broomstick sung by Hazel the McWitch. Fans of the classic TV theme tune will not be disappointed either – it's been Pasquale-ised to within an inch of its life, but is still there. Just as well – it simply wouldn't be Rentaghost without the customary spooks and ghouls and freaks and fools.
The tour starts early next year. We'll see you in the front row at Felixtowe.
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lol, i should've thought of you as soon as i read about this, but instead i started planning a group booking. for hastings. can't wait! x
I wonder whether Sue Nicholls will be out to show her support when this hits Manchester.
This looks like both the greatest and crappest thing likely to happen in 2006. The only way to improve it would be to cast Su Pollard as McWitch. Now there's an idea...