Tuesday, May 17, 2005
Send in the crabs!
In recent months, ITV1 have foisted some absolute nonsense on us in the name of "celebrity". But fucking hell, CELEBRITY LOVE ISLAND really does put the tin lid on it.
The extremely flimsy premise of this latest rubbishfest is that we will somehow be interested in watching 12 no-mark slebs as they all have it off on a nice beach. Last night's opening episode saw Abi Titmuss expressing indignation at being branded "promiscuous", Fran Cosgrave arguing with some posh bird about whether or not Jodi Marsh was ever really pregnant with his child, and 34-year-old Jayne Middlemiss crying for her mum.
Most offensive of all was that the pack of losers contained lowculture's personal Bête Noire, the talent vacuum that is Judi Shekoni.
Shekoni is notable only for the fact that she has managed to carve out a whole career on the back of a three-episode guest spot on EastEnders back in 2002.
A nice girl, we're sure, but frankly we could not give less of a toss about who happens to be throwing what up her – regardless of whether they are doing it on a desert island or up against the bottle bank round the back of Somerfield in Epping.
Having said all that, of course, cheekly little Paul Danan was not looking particularly ugly, so we might well tune in again tonight, just to make sure it wasn't a fluke.
Links to this post:
I may well get fired for this, but...
No no no! How can anyone find Paul Danan attractive? He munted when he was in Hollyoaks, he munts now, he will munt for eternity. And that is that.
Oh NO! Mr Kenneth begs to differ.
He's a bit of rough alright, but he has fantastic blue eyes. He looked great in those Rimmel ads with Kate Moss.
Judi Shekoni is ace. Well in a rubbish sorta way. She is incredibly remarkable at how shortly she was in Eastenders.Imagine how long she'll be around for after Celebrity Love Island - it sounds like at least 20 hours of tv so going by her current record I'd say she'll be around for the next twenty years milking her Celebrity Love Island appearance for all its' worth (I can imagine her turning up for Celebrity Love Island 40)
By 8:56 pm, at