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MONDAY'S LOW POINTS

The stuff you won't want to miss today.
» Morning On 4 from 7am, Channel 4 ... A lot of thought has clearly gone into the new morning line-up on 4. Only joking, they've just stuck on a load of old repeats and another dodgy US sitcom. The fun starts at 7am, with a repeat of the previous day's episode of The Salon, and continues at 7.30am, with yet another rerun of Friends, from the start. Then it's a double-bill of Everybody Loves Raymond (which has been running for so long in the US that it's had the honour of being remade as gay porn, with the title Everybody Does Raymond).
» Stars Reunited 10am, BBC1 ... Dale Winton returns with a second run of the series that brings the stars of ropey old TV shows together to chat about old times and watch clips. First up are the cast of 'Allo 'Allo.
» Star Trek: Enterprise 8pm, Sky One ... The naughty Xindi devastate the earth, leading T'Pol to weigh up the pros and cons of getting her tits out in about 12 episodes' time. To celebrate the start of the third series, producers have added 'Star Trek' to the title, and given the theme tune a hilarious remix, which makes it sound like the music from The Littlest Hobo. Captain Archer's dog is expected to be replaced with one of whatever kind of dog the Littlest Hobo was in due course.
» Is there something else we should be watching? Click on the comment link.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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