(function() { (function(){function c(a){this.t={};this.tick=function(a,c,b){var d=void 0!=b?b:(new Date).getTime();this.t[a]=[d,c];if(void 0==b)try{window.console.timeStamp("CSI/"+a)}catch(l){}};this.tick("start",null,a)}var a;if(window.performance)var e=(a=window.performance.timing)&&a.responseStart;var h=0=b&&(window.jstiming.srt=e-b)}if(a){var d=window.jstiming.load;0=b&&(d.tick("_wtsrt",void 0,b),d.tick("wtsrt_","_wtsrt", e),d.tick("tbsd_","wtsrt_"))}try{a=null,window.chrome&&window.chrome.csi&&(a=Math.floor(window.chrome.csi().pageT),d&&0=c&&window.jstiming.load.tick("aft")};var f=!1;function g(){f||(f=!0,window.jstiming.load.tick("firstScrollTime"))}window.addEventListener?window.addEventListener("scroll",g,!1):window.attachEvent("onscroll",g); })(); lowculture: One Seat Closer To Calvin

One Seat Closer To Calvin

The worst thing about travelling alone is the high possibility that some bastard airline or train company will decide to seat you next to a psychopathic drunk for the duration of your trip.
Only the other day, we suffered an unpleasant flight from Aberdeen to Heathrow in close proximity to a man with all broken teeth who clearly hadn't washed and was cheerfully knocking back wine at 9.15am.
So it was with considerable trepidation that we boarded the return flight the following day. But! We needn't have worried, because our random travelling companion for the evening was none other than Calvin from out of S Club 8!
We are pleased to report that Calvin:
» Boarded the flight with a guitar as hand luggage.
» Had a big coat.
» Did not partake of the in-flight meal – ham salad followed by profiterole.
» Chose a healthy glass of water from the drinks trolley.
» Listened to noisy rock music on his CD walkman for most of the journey.
» Grabbed a sick bag, making us briefly contemplate the prospect of a baby popstar vomiting on our shoes. (As it turned out, he was just spitting out his chewing gum into it).
» Tried to read the NME Big Book over our shoulder.
» Spent a lot of time fixing his hair.
» Started texting on his mobile phone before he reached the designated area of the terminal, potentially wreaking havoc with the aircraft systems.
» Disembarked at Heathrow, making sure he had all his personal belongings with him, before heading back to a life of teenage pop serfdom.

By Paul :: Post link :: ::  
0 pop-up comments :: Discuss on messageboard

Links to this post:

<\$BlogItemBacklinkCreate\$>

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Tiny things for you to watch:

* To open in a
new window,
click anywhere
EXCEPT the icon.

messageboard

Your views from our forums. Click on the quote to join the discussion.




About Us

According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

GET IN TOUCH:
Click here to email.

La Vida Lowculture