Friday, May 23, 2003
Here are the results of the Lowculturese jury (part 76)
There are 26 of these bastard Eurovision songs, you know. And they must all be reviewed and rated for your reading pleasure. Remind us not to do this ever again. Anyway, we'd better get on with the remaining lowculture verdicts, hadn't we?
17) GREECE » Never Let You Go – Mando
» THE WORDS...
What we share keeps me alive,
For you there's nothing I would deny
All I know is I want you to go
Cause I'd never let you go
» THE VERDICT... The prize for most make-up is almost certain to go to Mando, even if she doesn't win the competition. There's something strangely likeable about this, though. It sounds a bit like the single that Kathy from Emmerdale released that we certainly don't own. Loving the Kate Bush-style shriek at the end.
» BET YOU NEVER KNEW... Mando performed in the musical Jesus Christ Superstar at the age of 14.
18) NORWAY » I'm Not Afraid To Move On – Jostein Hasselgard
» THE WORDS...
Lay Down With Someone Strange
Dare to be the same, as always in time
Slowly seek the end in its glory
Wherever to seek, if it's gone, deep inside
» THE VERDICT... Oh, Norway, Norway, Norway! You've picked a wrong 'un again. It's not bad as such, just a bit boring, and Jostein seems to be making little or no effort to sing in key. It's like One For Sorrow gone terribly, terribly wrong.
» BET YOU NEVER KNEW... Norway have scored 'nil points' four times. 67% of Norwegian TV viewers tuned in last year, and they weren't even in it!
19) FRANCE » Monts et Merveilles (The Moon and the Stars) – Louise Baileche
» THE WORDS...
I was full of joy, then I've gone through sorrow
I shared your life, now there's no home for me
I know I shouldn't talk about it
And at least try to slightly forget
Each other we promised the moon and the stars
» THE VERDICT... This is a bit more like it. A proper song that doesn't sound like someone's just tried to copy bits out of millions of other songs. It's teetering on the edge of Tori Amos territory, though. At least Louise seems to be able to sing without getting hysterical, which is a novelty.
» BET YOU NEVER KNEW... Louise lists Oleta Adams as one of her idols.
20) POLAND » Zadnych Granic (No Borders) – Ich Troke
» THE WORDS...
No borders, no flags, from there, from above
The world seems so beautiful
No countries, no nations, no wars
Can be seen from above.
» THE VERDICT... There's always one pack of losers that try to convince us, through the medium of a deathly-boring song, that we should all live in peace and harmony, and this year is no exception. Dull, self-important Euro-pish, enlivened only by the odd hair of the male singer.
» BET YOU NEVER KNEW... The Polish public chose their Eurovision entry for the first time this year, so they only have themselves to blame.
21) LATVIA » Hello From Mars – F.L.Y.
» THE WORDS...
'Cause this is going to be the day when we will meet
When heaven comes so down to earth to say Hello from Mars.
» THE VERDICT... Hooray! One we like, at last. It's good, old-fashioned Europop that's not trying too hard to be wacky or ironic and, like all good songs, it goes a bit crazy at the end, with the shouting and the arm-waving. And it ends with an 80s-tastic orchestral stab. Hoorah.
» BET YOU NEVER KNEW... The three bods in this group are well-know as solo artists in Latvia.
» If you want to check the entries out for yourself, click off to the BBC Eurovision Website, then click back here, get busy with the comment link, and tell us what you think. And if you missed previous verdicts, just scroll down a bit, or check the archive.
By Paul :: Post link
:: 
::
0 pop-up comments
:: Discuss on messageboard
