(function() { (function(){function c(a){this.t={};this.tick=function(a,c,b){var d=void 0!=b?b:(new Date).getTime();this.t[a]=[d,c];if(void 0==b)try{window.console.timeStamp("CSI/"+a)}catch(l){}};this.tick("start",null,a)}var a;if(window.performance)var e=(a=window.performance.timing)&&a.responseStart;var h=0=b&&(window.jstiming.srt=e-b)}if(a){var d=window.jstiming.load;0=b&&(d.tick("_wtsrt",void 0,b),d.tick("wtsrt_","_wtsrt", e),d.tick("tbsd_","wtsrt_"))}try{a=null,window.chrome&&window.chrome.csi&&(a=Math.floor(window.chrome.csi().pageT),d&&0=c&&window.jstiming.load.tick("aft")};var f=!1;function g(){f||(f=!0,window.jstiming.load.tick("firstScrollTime"))}window.addEventListener?window.addEventListener("scroll",g,!1):window.attachEvent("onscroll",g); })(); lowculture: I Love Europe!

I Love Europe!

GREETINGS. MY NAME IS MARIJA ŠERIFOVIC, AND I AM STILL EUROVISION.

After the not satisfactory response from my last announcement, I am back. You will read my words and agree. Molitva was the name of my winning song, and it is still sung in the European countries today. The hearts beat to Molitva!

I received a telephone call some days ago. The caller, a lady, I could not hear her well, but it sounded like she was calling ‘Puta! Puta!’. I reminded her that my name is Marija Šerifovic, and not Puta, and that I am the Eurovision champion, with my Grand Prix-winning song, Molitva, and that it means ‘Prayer’ in English, but she did not understand. She screamed something else, that sounded like ‘Jiggy! Ola!’. I do not understand, but I am Marija Šerifovic, so I terminated the call.

The lowculture want me to discuss the new entries. This week, they gave me another reasonable present, a big dog, that I appreciate. She is beautiful, but I am troubled: I do not know what to call her. Perhaps you, my reader, can suggest a name?

As I believe in the freedom of peoples to express, here is my expert opinion on the latest songs to enter into the Eurovision, to live in harmony with the shadow of my Molitva. If they merit praise, they receive the Mini-Marija for effort.


Cyprus: Evdokia Kadi - Femme fatale



A beautiful lady! She walks all over homosapien males. I am coming Evdokia, just!


Denmark: Simon Mathew - All Night Long



Last year, they had a beautiful lady drama queen. This year: meh.


Estonia: Kreisiraadio - Leto svet



This commences with wonderful dancing. Then is ruined by homosapien males who are not creating a victory for real music like I did last year with my Molitva.


Lithuania: Jeronimas Milius - Nomads In The Night



This homosapien male tries to recreate the power of my Molitva. BUT HE FAILS.


Slovenia: Rebeka Dremelj - Vrag naj vzame



Two beautiful ladies in unison! BEFORE A HOMOSAPIEN MALE INTRUDES.

There are four more entries to preview, but I have seen enough. I cannot bear any more. I will return shortly with more travesties. Before then, here is true Eurovision glory:

Serbia: Marija Šerifovic - Molitva



Beautiful ladies. Beautiful singing. This MUST represent Serbia in 2008!


With continued thanks to Craig.

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2 Comments:

Call it 'Sir'. Short for Terry.


xx

By Anonymous TJ, at 1:45 am  

"Puta" means "bitch" in brazilian portuguese!

By Blogger Tom, at 6:47 pm  

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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