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Friday, June 18, 2004

TANYA'S BLONDE HIGHLIGHTS

All the TV that's mad, bad, or just a little bit evil for Friday. Our Tiny Tanya Turner ratings show just how low each show goes – the more Tanyas a show scores, the more mental it is.
» RUBBISH! FILM: Final Descent, Five, 3.35pm
Another of Five's high quality mid-afternoon TV movies. This one's the usual kind of rubbish about mountaineers who must outwit a gang of ruthless theives, but what makes it interesting for us is a double whammy of Melrose Place alumnii. Patrick Muldoon played Richard in Melrose – he was murdered by sisters Jane and Sydney for being a bit of a bad lot, only the silly girls forgot to check he was actually dead, providing a memorable season finale in which his fist burst out of the shallow grave they had buried him in. Antonio Sabato Jr was one of Amanda's husbands. He was also a bit of a bad lot, and we think she might have murdered him too, but we can't remember if he later returned from the dead (although this is quite likely).
» MISSING! Coronation Street, No Time, No Channel
Another night without Corrie! This is just taking the piss now.
» FABULOUS! Queer Eye For The Straight Guy
A welcome terrestrial outing for the gang of gays who go around mugging hopeless straight men and robbing them of their masculinity.
» CHORTLE! Bo' Selecta, Channel 4, 10.30pm
Let the cries of "it's not as good as it used to be" start HERE – before an episode is even aired (it will save time later).
» Are we missing something great? Or even something rubbish – we're honestly not fussed! Click on the comment link below and tell us all about it.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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Previously

JAMIE'S (WAY WITH) WORDS :: LOOK! :: PAIR OF MUPPETS :: TANYA'S BLONDE HIGHLIGHTS :: WHO THE HELL ARE YOU? :: COMPACT APARTMENT, SHORT TERM LET AVAILABLE :: FUCK ME FACTS! :: WHY D'YOU WANNA GO THOUGH TIME AND SPACE? BECAUSE ... :: GOING OUT WITH A BANG :: TANYA'S BLONDE HIGHLIGHTS ::

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