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WEDNESDAY'S LOW POINTS

The stuff you won't want to miss today.
» This Morning 10.30am, ITV1 ... Yes, you've guessed it. Uncle Cliff Richard is back to punish the nation for a third morning in quick succession. Today, his instrument of torture is his ancient hit, Saviour's Day.
» The Bill 8pm, ITV1 ... It's official – Cathy Bradford is the best thing on telly. Forget panto villain Richard Hillman – Cathy is truly the scariest bitch on the box. Today, she is basking in the afterglow of burning down Brandon's house. How long can she get away with her reign of terror? Not very, sadly. But the festive episodes are going to be unmissable.
» The Million Pound Property Experiment 9pm, BBC2 ... Can our favourite TV couple triumph in the face of adversity to raise a million quid for Children in Need?
» Is there something else we should be watching? Click on the comment link.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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