David Sneddon has been whizzing round lowcultureland (alias Scotland) this week trying to flog his new album.
Our local radio station, the spectacularly dreadful Northsound 1, ran a competition which promised one lucky school a performance from the bold Sneddo, and VIP treatment for the lucky individual who entered on behalf of her mates.
The lucky winner was Rebecca Simpson, who goes to Harlaw Academy in Aberdeen, and the school's pupils were, apparently, delighted at the news of their exclusive performance.
Sadly, the teachers at Harlaw were not quite as excited about the prospect of Snedders strutting his stuff in their assembly hall, and called the whole thing off, claiming they had not been given enough notice. Spoilsports!
The story has a happy ending for the pupils at Westhill Academy, who won an audience with David by default, and seemed perfecty capabale of making all the necessary arrangements in time.
David's arrival has been underwhelming people all over Scotland - the good people of Edinburgh were treated to a school concert as well, but while he was inside, they let his tyres down.
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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses.
We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.