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Becca is not best pleased in HOLLYOAKS (Channel 4, 6.30pm). This is because she has caught Tony in the act of pleasuring the lovely Ruth, in a sexual manner. As it becomes increasingly obvious that Ruth is only in town to try to get the lowdown on the whole serial killer/coma girl business, it will be interesting to see just how quickly Tony gets ditched when she gets the story.
Soap trials are always much more entertaining than real ones. They always start on a Monday, get boring by Wednesday, are turned on their heads by a surprising revelation on Thursday, and are all wrapped up by Friday, usually with someone going to jail if they didn't do it, or walking free if they did. Also, everyone in the cast is able to get a seat in the public gallery, and you can shout, heckle and generally interrupt proceedings as much as you like. And so it will be this week in EMMERDALE (ITV1, 7pm), where Charity is in the dock for the murder of her husband Chris. We all know that he necked a load of cyanide to try to fit her up for the crime, but will the jury be smart enough to realise this? One thing is certain – there will be a surprise go-to-jail card for someone tonight, and it's not Charity.
In CORONATION STREET (ITV1, 7.30pm and 8.30pm), Rita is starting to feel the strain of her battle with the evil Cilla, and Fred is trying to pair up Ashley and Claire, the drippy nanny. And, in accordance with the law of soap which states that anyone who is ever sacked from a job will be reinstated not less than four weeks later, Tommy is back in his overalls at the garage tonight. There are conditions, though – Kevin tells him he will be out on his ear again unless he can stay sober and keep his temper under control. So he will probably get his P45 within about a fortnight.
Paul and Janine are dividing up the spoils of their wicked scheme to defraud Barry in EASTENDERS (BBC1, 8pm). Paul ends up with £3000, but makes a surprising decision about how to dispose of the loot. Will an act of kindness result in an unlikely new romance? (Clue – yes, with Natalie).

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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