The stuff you won't want to miss today.
» The Simpsons 6pm, BBC2 ... Mr Burns travels to Scotland in an attempt to buy the Loch Ness Monster.
» Coronation Street 7.30pm, ITV1 ... We really hope this episode has a bit less shouting than Monday's ones. They were an offence to our delicate sensibilities.
» The Bill 8pm, ITV1 ... Oooooooooooooooh dear. Cathy Bradford is not a happy woman. That little strumpet Honey Harman is moving in on her beloved Brandon. Given that our Cath murdered her last rival for PC Kane's affections, that's probably not the wisest thing Honey could be doing.
» How Clean Is Your House 8.30pm, Channel 4 ... Kim and Aggie meet a man who has lived in the same house all his life – but has never cleaned or decorated it!
» Is there something else we should be watching? Click on the comment link.
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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses.
We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.