As we all know, Bible-bashing Big Brother winner Cameron "Stout" Stout is well past his celebrity expiry date. So we were alarmed to spot his grinning mug on the front page of a leading newspaper today.
Well, when we say "leading" we actually mean The Sunday Post, a peculiar Scottish paper which is full of home-spun philosophy ("Faced with the power of Mother Nature, mankind is still an infant"), medical problems ("I walked into a car door on holiday many years ago"), heart-warming human interest tales ("Yes, friends used to joke about Sarah’s watch being ten minutes fast, but not now, because Molly has told them that’s what saved her dad’s life.") and, very occasionally, some news.
It transpires that Cameron, whoever he is, has signed up to write an exclusive weekly column, in which he shares his provocative and eloquent views on a variety of subjects – all of them Big Brother.
If you've found yourself lying awake at night wondering just what Cameron thinks about David Blaine sitting in his stupid box for weeks on end, then we can put you out of your misery.
"Let me tell you," says our Cam, "if he reckons it's difficult sitting in a glass box, constantly in the public eye..."
(wait for it ...)
"...he should try going on Big Brother!"
And thus, the standard is set. We reckon that Cameron's musings can't get any worse. But we're quite prepared to be proved wrong, so we will report back next week.
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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses.
We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.