Tuesday, September 16, 2003
Farmyard fun (and not in the bestiality porn spam sense, for a change)
To Ireland, where the relentless flogging of every conceivable reality TV concept continues.
As you will remember, our Irish friends have not had a great deal of success with such formats – their "Big Brother on a boat" concept proved unable to hold water when the boat sank during the first week.
But, God bless 'em, they keep trying, as Jean from Two Slugs Kissing reports:
» The geniuses at RTE have come up with the celebrity reality concept to beat all celebrity reality contests – Celebrity Farm!
You may think that coming up with such a clever title has exhausted their creative minds, but not a bit of it – they have covered every possible angle.
There are six celebrities, and five are complete nonentities – I was only able to recognise two of them. They've slipped up badly, however, by including one who could be described as a household name – Twink, who's been appearing in pantos here since the dawn of time. But she was the first to get voted off for being a shouty bossy cow, so that's ok.
They have an outrageously terrible presenter, who seems to be trying desperately hard to imitate Davina McCall by having a big nose and shouting a lot and breathing hard even when nothing exciting is happening (which is all the time).
Also, there's a really lame catchphrase for when people get voted off: "Who will be turfed out?!"
They have by far the cheapest and tackiest set ever seen – it's obviously just someone's grandmothers house, with china plates on the wall and really horrible gaudy flowered furniture that makes it difficult to see what's going on.
One of the contestants, a former Rose of Tralee (glam!) is a bulimic alleged shoplifter so it might be interesting to see if she cracks up. And, hilariously, they have to milk cows and have wheelbarrow races and stuff like that.
It will be interesting to see whether this concept is franchised out to other countries and becomes a massive international phenomenon like Big Brother. I'm putting my money on 'Not'.