Monday, August 18, 2003
Haven't we seen you somewhere before?
Remember these? No, not those, although we are talking about a Jordan (of a type).
Y'see, we've come to the conclusion some of today's "salabrities" are actually craftily reconstructed 16-bit games cartridges after stumbling across this site.
It seems that the likes of Jordan, Darius and even The Cheeky Girls could be little more than lines of programming code if the following Sega Megadrive titles of old are anything to go by: Darius 2, The Chiki Chiki Boys and (our favourite) Jordan vs Bird.
But perhaps we're being harsh comparing the starlets above with entertainment technology that is past its sell by date.
For instance, Darius 2 is attractive, has all the right moves and isn't too hard on the ears, but after a few minutes you begin to realise everything that follows is exactly the same. Which is totally unlike, er . . .
Moving on, The Chiki Chiki Boys may have no dance routine to speak of, but they are twins who look alike and say very little. But behind the pretty graphics and cute sprites, there's little in the way of substances. Not at all like the . . ahem.
Okay, we hoped that Jordan vs Bird* would be as far away from the game's pin-up pair namesake as Posh Spice and a recording career.
But after a heavily made up loading screen our worst fears were confirmed - there was simply no activity going on in that little black box**. It wouldn't load.
Which celebrities do you think bear uncanny resemblances to computer game characters, or which should be? Let us know by clicking on the comment link below.
*No, not the working title of a glamour assignment, or Jordan and Jodie's latest scrap in a pub (although both scenarios are perfectly fitting).
**The Megadrive, for goodness sakes, we mean the Megadrive.