The schlock you won't want to miss today
» Where The Heart Is 11am, UK Gold ... Only hours after we declare our shameful love for this heartwarming Pam Ferris-fest on the lowculture messageboard, we spot it lurking in the early morning schedules. Hoorah! And don't worry if you have to go to work or somewhere equally trivial – you can see it on UK Gold 2 tonight at 8pm.
» TV Scrabble 6pm, Ftn ... Once, Toby Anstis bestrode the world of children's TV like a (small-ish) Colossus. Now, he's presenting this. Funny how things turn out, isn't it?
» One True Voice: Pop Go The Rivals 8pm, Sky One ... Recorded just before the release of their flop single and all the rumours of a split, this should be unintentionally hilarious. And it will have jolly old Uncle Pete Waterman in it, claiming to have invented everything since the dawn of creation.
» How Clean Is Your House 8.30pm, Channel 4 ... Janet has five bedrooms, and has not been cleaning any of them. Kim and Aggie will not be impressed.
» Is there something else we should be watching? Click on the comment link.
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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses.
We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.