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TV things you will only understand if you are Scottish

1. Dotaman
In which Donnie Macleod would prance around in a manner quite unbecoming a man of his age. Think Timmy Mallet with a beard, talking Gaelic, and singing ludicrous songs of his own devising. Unbelievaby, this is still on!
2. Glen Michael's Cartoon Cavalcade
Freaky Sunday afternoon treat that was on just before Scotsport which showed only the very worst cartoons the animiation industry had to offer. Glen was usually aided by a funny little dog called Rusty and an old oil lamp called Paladin, which could speak in the barely-disguised voice of Glen Michael, and was always slagging him off. It had the best theme tune of any programme ever, even when STV tried to jazz it up in the late 80s with a series of ill-advised remixes. And you could write in with your birthday dedications.
3. The Untied Shoelaces Show
Because we got our summer holidays slightly earlier than the rest of the UK, we used to get special holiday tv programmes, of which this was the most notable. It was presented by 'Tiger' Tim Stevens, and always had a really boring magician or something. It was a blessed relief when the repeats of the Pink Pather and Heidi kicked in around August.
4. Thingamijig
Jack McLaughlan. In a kilt. Every Friday night. Pretending to have a barn dance in the STV studios in Cowcaddens. Hoots!
5. Now You See It
Johnny Beattie presented this ridiculous gameshow, which somehow managed to last for nine years.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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