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Sunday's Low Points

The schlock you won't want to miss today
» Popworld 9.30am, Channel 4 ... If you're anything like us, it's extremely likely that, by the time you've read this, you will already have missed what is quite possibly the best TV pop show in the history of the world. If we could marry both Simon and Miquita, but possibly only have sex with Simon, we would.
» Dick and Dom In Da Bungalow 1pm, CBBC ... Handy early-afternoon repeat of the insane kids' show.
» The Simpsons 6.30pm, Sky One ... It seems that no TV programme these days is complete without a bit of token girl-on-girl action, and tonight The Simpsons jumps on the lesbo bandwagon with an unlikely storyline involving Lisa, a spelling bee and two ladies kissing.
» Smallville 6.35pm, Channel 4 ... Cute-but-dumb Whitney returns from being in the army, but all is not as it first appears. Clark continues to be cute-but-smart.
» Dream Team 8pm, Sky One ... Season Finale alert! Lynda Block's on the phone from Cell Block H, or wherever the fuck she is, and Abbie Fletcher is not particularly delighted by what she has to say. Meanwhile, poor, useless Phil is forced to take a gamble that could end his career ... or Fletch's. The last episode of Dream Team is always utterly fantastic, and this year's offering looks like it will be too. And would it be too much to hope for that the mysterious head of the betting syndicate is revealed to be mega-bitch-slut Victoria Baptise? Probably, but we bet whatever they have lined up is just as good.
» Is there something else we should be watching? Click on the comment link.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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