Thursday, May 29, 2003
Here comes the fraud
"It was the event of the year and absolutely everyone's still talking about it," claims the BBC website.
And, by God, they are as well!
We're talking, of course, about Dale's Wedding, the recent BBC3 show in which His Orangeness, Dale Winton, apparently got married to I'm A Celebrity... survivor Nell McAndrew
It was, they said, the most unbelievable pairing of the 21st century. Indeed, we were so reluctant to believe it that we didn't bother to watch the programme. But you, our increasingly unpredictable readers, have demanded full and immediate coverage, so we asked our most rabid followers, the good people of the lowculture messageboard, what they thought of the whole fiasco. And this is what they said:
» "I saw some of it while flicking between programmes," wailed thispunkrockstar. "It was... weird.
"It was like they were all celebrities acting (and some of them really convincingly) as if it was a real wedding. There was this whole subplot about Nell and Dale's relationship, and whether or not it would last... this weird analogy about Nell being a wounded bird, and when wounded birds heal.. they fly away! Etc
"I think Paul O'Grady summed it up best on V Graham Norton on Friday night: 'Dale getting married, have you ever heard anything so ridiculous? I mean, how's Dale Winton gonna get a fanny up his arse?'"
» "I saw ten minutes last night (it was better than the European Cup Final) before discovering Supergirl on sci-fi (and there is something about a fit lady in skin tight blue lycra that I find appealing)," admitted QuincyMD.
"Basically, a lot of third-rate celebs came on and said Dale was a real hit with the laydeez.
"A desperate Gina G was somehow convinced to spout how Dale had shagged her in the ToTP studio or somesuch.
"When, in the space of ten minutes, the guests are Gina G, Cilla Black and Chris Moyles then you know it is time to switch off.
"Maybe next time they could do *Legally questionable remarks about a famous popstar's best mate removed* 's Wedding ..."
Don't hold your breath for that one, Quincy ...