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Do not adjust your internet

CHAT! That Antony Cotton Show, ITV1, 5.00pm

That Antony Cotton ShowWell, possibly just a little bit. This isn't going to be a traditional lowculture puff piece where we babble on, ostensibly knowing all about a programme that we haven't actually seen yet and exhorting you all to watch it. This is one of our lesser-known, brows furrowed, Marge Simpson-esque "hmmmmmmmm" moments where we babble on about the fact that we don't quite know what to make of something, but have our suspicions that it's going to be quite shit.

Last week a friend of ours sent us a brilliant e-mail meme originating from the ITV audience duty logs, from a person claiming to having been in the audience at the filming of the pilot for this series. We'd dearly love to repost the entire thing here, but our keen desire to not get our firm bottoms sued from here to San Francisco prevents that, so we shall instead point out that it was long, waspish and contained the sort of language that would make Quentin Tarantino squeal and cover his ears. Suffice to say, said member of said audience was unimpressed.

That's really all we have to go on at this stage, beyond the predictably camp trailers and the twee "That" at the start of the title, presumably carrying on the fine tradition of That 70s Show, That Gay Show, That Mitchell and Webb Look and "that bitch with the cheap hairdo is giving me evils". Previous attempts by ITV to recuperate the loss of Paul O'Grady to Channel 4 have included the lamentable Sharon Osbourne Show, and this will have to work hard to be worse than that. We wouldn't rule it out, mind. Early feedback from the boards has not been favourable either; particularly noteworthy was David Hunter's observation that the member of the Coronation Street cast most deserving of their own chatshow is clearly Blanche. The campaign starts here.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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