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Whenever you sing like that, we'll go home

Fans of 80s pop star Paul Young (ask your mum) decided nostalgia really was a thing of the past after hearing him sing at Derby's Assembly Rooms this week.
Around 200 ticket buyers, a quarter of all those attending, walked out on the singer only a few songs into the set, after describing his performance as like listening to a "pub karaoke night".
"Paul's voice was frankly awful, and the the acoustics were very poor," said one.
"He used to have such a wonderful, soulful voice, but last night he was trying to sing like Joe Cocker*."
So far, 140 of those attending have asked for a refund on the tickets, priced at the I-still-have-to-eat cost of £18.50 each.
Several fans visiting Paul's website have left disgruntled messages about the tour, which received a similar welcome at a Scottish venue not too far from lowculture Towers last year.
But the gravel-voiced singer's agent said the star had been well received at Derby. "He possibly had a sore throat," she said.
*ask your gran.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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