Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Insert patronising Mary Alice voiceover here
ENDING! Desperate Housewives, Channel 4, 10.00pm
You'd better pack a lot of snacks and drinks for this one - Desperate Housewives is one for two whole hours tonight to wrap things up in the season finale. While it's fairly obvious that season two hasn't had anything like the impact that season one did, it's certainly had its moments and we're going to miss it while we endure a prolonged absence from the ladies of Wisteria Lane.
So, where are we at this stage in the game? Well, Lynette has moved out and taken the kids with her, which - in a refreshing display of good continuity - is exactly what she promised Tom she would do way back in season one if she ever found out that he'd cheated on her. She's not taking his calls, and Tom's trying to get to her through her friends, notably notorious easy mark Susan. Really, we think Tom should just play the waiting game. More than a week alone with her ungodly children and we suspect even an ice maiden like Lynette would be willing to hear his case. Having failed to stop her slutty daughter from eloping with her hunky-but-from-an-iffy-family boyfriend, or to stop her gay sociopathic son from sleeping with her boyfriend, Bree has admitted defeat and checked herself in to the local mental hospital, having told the others she's having a spa treatment. Bree is spending the days raking sand in very straight lines (obviously) and refusing to talk about her children - that'll be a quick recovery, then.
At Casa Solis, Gabrielle and Carlos got Xiao Mei the maid knocked up with their own hellspawn, and now Xiao Mei is flicking those doe eyes in Carlos's direction. This is all going to end in tears, we can just tell. No doubt Gabrielle will spend large chunks of this episode trying to catch them together, and then acting mortally wounded when she succeeds. For one thing, people who go spying are seldom likely to like what they discover, and for another, that's some classy behaviour for a woman who spent most of last season statutorily raping her BOBFOC gardener. Poor clumsy Susan is still homeless after Edie burnt the place down (and was rewarded with a faceful of beestings for her trouble, and now looks like a circus freakshow), and once again finds herself in the middle of two men vying for her attention - this time it's ex-husband Karl and ex-boyfriend Mike. Who will win fair Susan's heart? We're not sure we care any more, but we'd like to know what fragrance Susan uses so we can isolate the pheromones she puts out.
And of course there's Crazy Creepy Felicia's plan to get Paul Young and Button-Up Zach out of the way for good. Will she succeed? We hope so, because we're quite bored of them. If last season's finale is anything to go by, expect a few shocking turns of events before the finale, and quite possibly a death or two. Hooray! We can't wait for season three.
By Steve :: Post link
:: 
::
1 pop-up comments
:: Discuss on messageboard
1 Comments:
And how amazing was Susan's permed hair do in the flashback where Bree and Rex met Mary Alice Smug for the first time?
A. Mazing.
And what hormones was Mary Alice on? She towers over the others.
