The schlock you won't want to miss today
» Murder, She Wrote 2.35pm, BBC1 ... Jessica investigates the murder of a woman who has been dead for centuries. What, herself?
» TOTP2 6.20pm, BBC2 ... Kriss Kross make a welcome appearance. Will it be the Mac Daddy or the Daddy Mack who gets you? Who knows. Make sure you turn off straight after them, though, as there are two Simply Red songs after that.
» British Soap Awards 8pm, ITV1 ... Absolutely no one will be gripped by this sorry occasion, as all the results were in the papers on Sunday. And where's Jane Gurnett's gong for Best Insincere Smile In A Crossroads Title Sequence? She was robbed!
» Back To The Future 9pm, Sci-Fi ... Travel back in time to 1985 for this classic slice of hokum – and you don't even need a souped-up Delorian to get there.
» Celebrity Shag Match 11.30pm, Sky One ... Tonight, it's Appleton v Appleton – who's the biggest dirty stopout?
» Men and their Sheds 11.30pm, Discovery Home & Leisure ... Does exactly what it says on the tin.
» Is there something else we should be watching? Click on the comment link.
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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses.
We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.