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Monday's Low Points

Don't make any plans to go out today – there's loads of 'em!
» Crossroads 5pm, ITV1 ... What did we tell you? Yes, Oona used the Friday karaoke session to beg Tracey to leave Dave alone with a heartbreaking rendition of 'Jolene'. Today, Oona announces she plans to leave Kings Oak. Don't go, Oon, we love you!
» Today with Des and Mel 1pm, ITV1 ... An extraordinary double whammy of guests today – Gail from Corrie and Gloria Gaynor. They will survive ... but will we?
» Dr Phil 2pm, Sky 1 ... The doc meets a lady who owns 15 cats.
» Holiday 7pm, BBC1 ... The lovely Craig Doyle goes gay for a week with a report from top homo resort Sitges. Bring on the late night uncut version, please!
» Plastic Surgery Ruined My Life 9pm, five ... Maybe it did, but we've got a feeling this programme is going to enrich ours no end.
» Is there something else we should be watching? Click on the comment link.

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According to Marxist theory, cultural forms such as opera, classical music and the literary works of Shakespeare all fall under the heading of high culture. Low culture refers to a wide variety of cultural themes that are characterised by their consumption by the masses. We might not be Marxists, but we do know we loved Footballers Wives. If you do too, you'll know what this is all about.

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